Hidden Feelings

written June 15, 2000

I wonder if he loves me still.
(I wonder if she ever will.)

I'm tired of waiting all these years.
(I have so many doubts and fears.)

If I confess the way I feel, he'll be too scared to stay.
(If I asked her, she might say no. Who am I anyway?)

Is there someone else he cares for? And is all my dreaming wrong?
(Does she know there's been no one else; it's been her all along?)

He doesn't even talk to me. How then could we be close?
(I was never a romantic, and I like to take things slow.)

Stolen glances. Hidden feelings. Is this all we'll ever be?
(I wish my eyes could speak and say how much she means to me.)

People think I'm foolish, choosing someone so carefree.
(I know I don't deserve her. She's so different from me.)

I wish I could forget him, but each day my feelings grow.
(I want her, but I've got my pride. Can't let my feelings show.)

I can't wait forever. I just can't keep this inside.
(I hope she waits until I overcome my fear and pride.)

But still, there could be no one else. My heart just screams his name.
(If she chose somebody else, I'll never be the same.)

For now, I'll be content believing that he loves me too.
(No silence, distance, doubt or time could change how much I do.)